the GOP's latest “Biden scandal” collapses into another clownshoes cluster****

[aubiefifty 18,259]

Open in app or online the GOP's latest “Biden scandal” collapses into another clownshoes cluster**** can't anyone around here do a proper fake scandal any more? Jeff Tiedrich Jun 15     Share   stop me if you’ve heard this one before: “guys, we got him now. Joe Biden’s going down. the whole Biden Crime Family is going down.” that’s right, the Republican party has a brand new Biden scandal to sell you. here it is, in a nutshell: when Joe Biden was vice president, he took a $5 million bribe and the FBI has seventeen audiotapes that prove it. Upgrade to paid the entire wingnut outrage-industrial complex has been screeching about it for a month now, in a desperate bid to distract the rubes from Donald Trump’s indictment for actual crimes. first, James Comer held a press conference where he promised to leave no imaginary stone unturned. he vowed to subpoena the entire world, if necessary. next, they took poor old 162-year-old Chuck Grassley — a man so far into his dotage that he longer knows which end is up — and shoved him in front of a camera to deliver an incoherent word salad punctuated with numerous allegedlys. and then, the strangest ******* thing happened: wingnut media actually started to push back and ask questions. here’s some Newsmax bobblehead actually getting James Comer to admit that “we don't know if they're legit or not.” I don’t know what triggered this. is the far-right media ecosystem finally getting tired of all the defamation suits? from there, things began to unravel pretty quickly. here’s somehow-unindicted-sex-trafficker Matt Gaetz on somehow-still-not-in-prison-yet Steve Bannon’s podcast, equivocating at the twice speed of light: “right now the 17 tapes are alleged. no one has actually heard them and we don’t know where they are. they’re probably in another country.” here’s Ron Johnson, a man who never met a conspiracy theory he couldn’t exploit: “we don’t know that [the tape] exists … it's a claim, it’s an allegation. we don’t know whether they really exist or not.” and finally, we circle back to 174-year-old Chuck Grassley, screaming the quiet part out loud: “we aren't interested in whether or not the accusations against Vice President Biden are accurate or not.” holy s***. I have one question: so, if this whole deal is such a mystery and no one can confirm anything, why don’t we just find this FBI agent and have him tell his story firsthand? easy peasy lemon squeezy, right? well … we can’t, because, according to Esteemed Counsellor Rudolph J. Covidfart, Esquire, the FBI agent is … umm … err … dead. and just like that, the latest huge scandal that would finally take down the entire Biden Crime Family collapsed like a big stupid house of cards. the Republican party is a ******* joke and has degraded to the point where none of these clownshoes doofuses know how to gin up a proper fake scandal any more. it almost makes you nostalgic for the days of 34 Benghazi investigations. everyone is entitled to my own opinion is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Upgrade to paid

Edited June 15, 2023 by aubiefifty

[aubiefifty 18,259]

you MAGA boys will believe anything..................lol. but then yall voted for trump right IAM?

[aubiefifty 18,259]

poor ol MAGA's want something to be right to only end up like fools. like the american flag versus the pride flag. always going off half cocked only to find out out it is another wingnut lie. well unless you are a maga then you probably believe all the lies........................

[AU9377 6,037]

There are so few actual adults in the room that the MAGA cult soldiers just say anything at this point.