Top 10 reasons Auburn didn't play well

[eulessau 115]

10.  Everybody overslept and just barely made it to the game.

9.  We are young!

8.  We played 20 something freshmen - when was the last time any of them played a game before 7:00 pm?

7.  We overlooked Utah St. beacuase we prepared for MS.

6.  We never play well in the morning.

5.  We are young!

4.  Defensive front seven was looking in stands for bagman. 

3.  We have never seen a bubble screen before - who invented that!

2.  We are young!

1.  Pregame meal was catered by Updyke-REC Unlimited.

Just having fun, anybody got any to add?

[aujess07 4]

10. Wade Christopher was busy saving Metropolis from a meteor.

9. Our team was getting used to new material of our jerseys.

8. Ted Roof planned the defense plan around the Utah Utes, not Utah State.

7. Coach Chizik wanted to save Finkelstein for Mississippi State.

6. Auburn plays better when the crystal ball is actually on the trophy case. Thanks Aubie...

5. According to ESPN, 84,751 fans left the game early.

4. Coach Chizik wanted to make sure our good hands team was good to go.

3. Our team wanted to maintain the pattern of coming from behind to win games.

2. After watching the TCU/Baylor game, Gus Malzahn decided that the offenses shown Friday night were plentiful enough for the American people.

1. We asked the Carolina Panthers and the NCAA for the release of Cam Newton. Both organizations denied.

[BeachEagle 0]

10. The coaches ditched their headsets and purchased $25 dollar play-by-play radios from stadium vendors

9. Aubie dressed out at the LB position.

8. Darren Bates left his How To Tackle instructional video in the car.

7. The cheerleaders began shedding layers to deal with the heat.

6. Utah State found our playbook in the stairwell.

5. ESPN put it there.

4. The defense's uniforms were ordered two sizes too big so we could grow into them.

3. Ted Roof had a dentist appointment during the game.

2. Malzahn was on the phone with Cam.

1. We subbed the ESPN2 crew for the real OL and DL. 

[WDE_OxPx_2010 5,477]

10- The game was at 11 am. So are the next 3. (Only half kidding...)

9- The offensive line ate at french toast for breakfast, and naturally anything french will make you weak.

8- The defensive line didn't eat breakfast.

7- Darren Bates accidentally practiced at safety all fall while wishful thinking.

6- Utah State is coached by Joseph Smith's half brother once removed.

5- Auburn's young players were expecting cupcakes but instead got a calzone.

4- ESPN predicted a 4 win season. This wasn't supposed to be one of them.

3- DeAngelo Benton was late to breakfast and so he was assigned to carry Malzahn's headset all morning.

2- Eltoro Freeman was busy filing papers in the compliance office.

1- All our good players are gone (The motivation, not the truth).